THE DAILY WIRE · KENTUCKY, USA · 2026-08-17
Local Bear Bypasses Drive-Thru, Opts for Direct Delivery
A black bear in Kentucky bypassed the drive-thru entirely this week, forcing its way into a woman's home and helping itself directly to her bucket of KFC, according to multiple regional reports crediting the original account to dangerousminds.net.
The homeowner returned to find the take-out container raided and the bear, presumably satisfied, no longer on the premises. Kentucky wildlife officials routinely field bear-related calls this time of year as the animals bulk up ahead of winter denning, though few incidents involve a specific brand preference.
This reporter has covered break-ins before, but rarely one where the suspect left behind a grease-stained box as the only forensic evidence. Investigators have not said whether the bear ordered extra crispy or original recipe, a detail this desk considers relevant to establishing motive.
Big Darlene, a raccoon working the same neighborhood on a nightly basis, agreed to speak with this column on condition that her usual dumpster route not be disclosed. Her account of the bear's technique differs sharply from the official record.
The woman has since warned neighbors to secure their entrances and, presumably, their side dishes. No further KFC-related incidents have been reported as of press time.
“That bear didn't even case the joint first, just walked right in like he owned the place. Rookie mistake wearing that much fur when you're trying to be subtle, but I'll give him this — bears got a nose that can smell fried chicken through a locked door from half a mile off.” — Big Darlene, local raccoon
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