THE DAILY WIRE · POCONO MOUNTAINS, PENNSYLVANIA · 2026-10-06
Pocono Bear Seeks Table for One, Management Declines
A bear strolled into a restaurant in Pennsylvania's Pocono Mountains, bypassing the host stand entirely, in what this columnist can only describe as a seating dispute waiting to happen.
Yahoo's report confirms the bear was caught entering the establishment, though the paper trail is thin on what, if anything, it ordered, how staff responded, or how the animal was eventually persuaded to leave the premises.
The Poconos are no stranger to black bears wandering into human establishments in search of calories, and late summer is peak foraging season, which may explain the timing if not the audacity of walking in the front door.
Two-Bites, a raccoon who works the restaurant's dumpster corridor most nights, told this reporter the bear had been eyeing the building for a while before making its move. Their account of events differs from the official record.
No word yet on whether the restaurant has updated its door policy, though this reporter suspects a sign reading 'No Bears' is now under serious consideration.
Spun and done.
“Listen, I've gotten further into that restaurant's kitchen than that bear ever did, I just don't do it where cameras can see me. Bears pack on twenty thousand calories a day before hibernation, so honestly the menu pricing checks out from his side.” — Two-Bites, local raccoon
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